Have you ever had to swallow something so bitter that it leaves a vacuum-like hollow spot deep in your gut? I'm not talking about literally swallowing something....although it definately feels like it sometimes when troubles asail us doesn't it? I'm talking about the times when you find out that your friend has Cancer, or your child is in trouble, or someone you've loved has suddenly died, or you have been betrayed at the deepest level. I don't like that horrible helpless feeling that washes over me when something "bitter-tasting" occurs, but like a literal swallowing, it is the initial shock that is the worst, and then the digestion begins.
Lately, it seems like everywhere I turn, I am hearing about tragedy, violence, heartache, illness, and betrayal. A person can get downright down-under if the burdens of the world are allowed to take over in her heart. But the reality is, we are exposed to such agonizing things because they are part of the fabric of our lives. I'm not gonna lie....I would rather put my head in the sand to avoid facing things. And sometimes I turn and run swiftly in the opposite direction to try and escape the sorrow. I've never been a "face it head on" kinda girl. But some things just hit head-on whether we want it to or not.
When I am consumed with "self", I tend to choke on the "bitter things" more easily. But when my eyes are fixed on Jesus, most things pale in comparison to His amazing grace and His mysterious ways of revealing sparkling beauty and sweetness amidst the bitterness. When I truly take the time to look around at all of the good that is happening in this world, and in my life and in the lives of those I love, I find peace. When I am still, I remember that the Lord is on my side and has my best interest at heart...as He does all His children. His will trumps all wills. Oh, but I do wrestle with my "self" so often! I have to make a conscious effort to stop and look around and let go of the things that tie me into knots.
I have recently read a book called, " The Hardest Peace" by Kara Tippets and have been following her blog called Mundane Faithfulness. I have been truly humbled as I have followed her journey through Cancer. She has 4 young children and a vibrant heart for the Lord.....but she is dying. This woman, despite her pain and suffering, has maintained her ministry of speaking such wonder and love to a vast audience of readers. She has been faithful and persistent in sharing the goodness of God, even in her darkest days. She is honest and open about the hardest peace, but she always comes to one conclusion.....she has Jesus, and He is enough. I have been moved deeply by her words and her faith.
No matter what happens in this world, Jesus has overcome it and HE IS ENOUGH. Therefore, we can swallow those bitter things trust Him to help us digest and work through them in HIS strength. We can trust Him to not only get us through them, we can trust Him to use them to bring about new faith and new discoveries of His vast character of love and grace. So......take a deep breath and breathe Him in. Let His Spirit fill your soul as you sit in stillness before Him. Allow His Presence to be your focus and peace in this crazy mixed-up world. His sweetness will overshadow the bitter things as He reveals the goodness that is happening all around. And........the best is yet to come for those who trust Him!
"Be Still, My Soul"
by Catharina von Schlegel, 1697-?
Translated by Jane Borthwick, 1813-1897
1. Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
2. Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.
3. Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.
4. Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.
