A Mother's Day

They call it "Mother's Day".            

It's a day to celebrate mothers.  It's a day to thank moms for all that they have done, and all that they will do.
Some take their moms to brunch or dinner....some bring flowers.  But even though all of that is nice, it goes way deeper than that.

I've often thought that if all of the experiences and emotions of motherhood could be brought before us at once, it would probably bring us to our knees.  It would be both, so overwhelmingly joyful and so crushingly painful, at the same time. Because motherhood is that way.  And it doesn't stop.....ever.

From the time of conception, a mother is connected to her children in ways that are indescribable by human terms.  Agony and ecstasy are often a part of every day for a mother.  We love our kids so much that it hurts sometimes.  Isn't it strange that a love so deep can cause pain?  Well, it does.  Because every mama has times when she watches her child, young or old, struggle with life.  Every mama has days when she has to just count on the Lord to rescue and restore her child's brokenness.  Every mama has to learn when it's time to step back, rather than hover and try to fix things, because she knows it will grow her baby strong......and that can be agonizing.

Oh, but the love.....the love so strong that it is unbreakable and never ceasing.  A mother is given a love so deep and so otherworldly that no one or no thing can take it away or damage it.  It is unconditional and can withstand even the most heart-wrenching trials, and even the most tangled messes of life.......because a mother sees the beautiful in the ugly, and the hope in the aftermath of  a storm.

Umbilical cords aren't just for nurturing a growing fetus, umbilical cords of love, grace, guidance, and patience cannot be severed.  Even as our children are making their own way in life, those cords are still pulsating wildly, and circulating unwavering strength.

How can it be, that a mother be given such a privilege and such a task as to raising a child of God?  How can it be that there can be so much angst and so much love in the process?  Well....it goes way deeper than that.

In order to understand the love of God....and the heart of God, we have to experience it on our level.  Our human minds are finite and limited and so is our strength and our ability to love.  Without the constant pulsating flow of God's grace, through His amazing Holy Spirit in us and through us, motherhood would be the most daunting tasks in all of life.  But as an umbilical cord connects mother to child,  the Spirit of God connects Him to His children.  Jesus redeeming love made that Three-Stranded cord unseverable for all eternity......and we can count on His continuing flow of unconditional love and grace to extend out to the children He has entrusted to us.  Our experiences of joy and sorrow are felt by the heart of God Himself.  And we learn about life through His eyes.

He sees each one of His precious children as He has created them to be....and as they will become.  We just see the here and now.  We can rest in His great plan and purpose....even when our hearts are breaking over watching the struggle, and enduring the storm.

Mother's Day is about a mother's life....and a day to thank not only mother's, but a day to thank our gracious Father for loving us enough to bring us to our knees, over and over again, in praise AND in pleading on behalf of our children.

Mother's Day 5/2014

Spring Snow

Here it is....late spring and WE HAVE SNOW!!  May in Wyoming is so uncertain and unpredictable!  That's how life is sometimes too.  We never know when we will be showered with unpredictable circumstances or when the cold winds and blankets of icy burdens will cover us with chilling force.  But beneath the snow is thriving green grass and stubborn spring shoots that WILL NOT BE DAUNTED!  One thing is for sure........with the snow and rain, comes life sustaining moisture.  And with the storms of life, comes thirst quenching strength from God that nurtures and grows our faith.  The Son will come out....not tomorrow, not later, not when the foggy storm lifts.........the Son will come out right when we ask, and no matter what it may look like in our lives, He is here. 

"I will cause the shower to come down in his season;  there shall be showers of blessing." Ezekiel 34:26

And the Fog was Lifted

Have you ever been in a fog?  Maybe what comes to your mind when I say this, is real fog...I mean the kind caused by the clouds being so close to the ground that they touch the earth, leaving a white heavy thickness in the air.  Fog blurs our vision of things that were once clear to our sight.  I've been in fog so thick that I could only see as far as 10 feet in front of me.  When driving, this can be frightening and tends to slow things down to a cautious crawl, because we can't see what is up ahead.  What if there might be another car nearby?  Or a pedestrian or cyclist on the road?  So we creep along, almost powerless, keeping our eyes just on the pavement right in front of us, because if you don't, you can get off course and end up running off the road.   I really don't like that!  And have you ever walked in the fog?  It is cold and damp....and still.  Fog usually comes in waves and wisps.  It moves in stealth-like sneakiness, without making a sound.  One minute your surroundings are clear, and the next minute they are lost in the fog, and you had no idea that was going to happen.

I've been in a fog for awhile.  No, not the kind I just described, although the similarities run parallel.  One minute my faith was clear and I could see where I was going.....and the next minute all I could see was what was directly in front of me.  My vision of who I was and where I was going in my faith became stifled, and I crept along in fear of what might lay ahead.  I mean, what if there might be an obstacle in my path?  What if there might be people along the way that I might hurt or offend? What if someone might hurt or offend me? What if I shouldn't be on this road at all?  So, almost powerlessly, I just was moving from day to day, merely getting by, and only by taking that next step.

Now don't get me wrong, my faith in who God is, never wavered, because when you know the Lord, He IS your faith, and you know deep in your heart that He is your guide even in the foggiest of times.  But as I think about this, I realize it was my faith in the future that was dwindling.  It was my faith in what God could do in my life....what He could do with ME.

You know, when you are driving in the fog, you never forget how to drive the car, it's just that you can't drive the way you could without the fog.  And when walking in the fog, you never forget how to walk, you just aren't sure WHERE to walk.  Likewise, when in a spiritual fog, you don't forget what you know about God, and your relationship with Him never ceases......it's just that you lose sight of His plan and purpose.

And sometimes you forget how much He loves you.

When we lose sight of how much God loves us, it can be a very cold and damp place in life.

 Love is the Light that burns through those thick clouds of fog.  He shines through, dispersing the wisps of doubt and fear. He breaks up the billows of sorrow and hopelessness.  He gives vision to what lies ahead....to the joy set before us, in Him.  He restores our power to press ahead on the journey He has set before us.   You see, we may know how to drive, but without power, there is no driving.  We may know how to walk, but without strength, we cannot even stand.  Forgetting Who fuels us, and Who our true Power is, results in a pointless and joyless walk.

The other day, there was a break in the rainy and snowy weather we had been having.  The sun was shining brightly, and the birds were singing a chorus of gratitude.  My little dogs  ran and played in the yard, rather than running up to the front door to come inside.  The cat rolled around on the warm pavement of the driveway like she was trying to soak it in on every side.  People were out walking and riding their bikes, and everything seemed ALIVE! Oh the joy!  I think people were extra joyful because they were so grateful for the reprieve from the cold, damp weather!


That's how I feel today.....no, our weather is still not warm and sunny, but my heart is!  The fog of doubt and fear has lifted.  Through God's faithfulness to provide all that I needed in order to serve Him by giving the lecture for my Bible study, and then blessing me with a weekend at the Women of Faith conference with a dear friend, I feel renewed!  Not only do I feel renewed, I am extra joyful for the reprieve from the heaviness of  all of the things that were weighing me down.  What my heart knows, has burned through how I was feeling.  What I know about my Lord....and how I know HIM has been sparked!  Instead of focusing on the fog, I see the Son shining through.

Our feelings can be as deceitful as the thick and dense fog.  If we focus on them, we slow to a creeping crawl on our journey of faith.....fearful of what lies ahead.  But when we focus on the Son....who died so that we would not have to fear, and was raised to life so that we too may be empowered by His Spirit, we suddenly not only can move ahead, we can do it with passion, and purpose!

Why am I telling you this?  Because I want you to know that He died for you too.  And His power is mighty enough to fuel everyone who loves Him and who is walking this journey of faith with Him.  If you are weary, come to Him.  If you are lost in a fog of uncertainty, sorrow, pain, or loss, He will not only give you rest, but He will empower you in ways that would astound you!  If your faith has been stifled, it is not lost......it's just waiting for the Light of the Son to burn through, and I pray that happens soon!



                                                                                                      internet photo













We Dance

Home Sweet Home

The little room at the top of the stairs in my 2-story house is a sanctuary these days.  It's a place where I go to do my Bible study, listen to my music, and ponder the grace of God.  It's painted in a bright color, it's warm, and it's a place where I feel close to God.  But this room wasn't always like this....no....this room use to be a place where a mama's heart would sorrow, a place where her child transformed from being cheerful and eager-to-please, to sullen, private, and distant.  This room used to bring fear to my heart each time I passed by, wondering what things might be hidden there....or what I may not find there.  How many times did that teenager sneak out the bedroom window and drop to the ground and disappear into the night as I slept right down the hall?  It's those kinds of things that bring fear to a mama's heart.  Oh, it wasn't always that way....at one time it was a place where I read stories, decorated the wall with a big tree filled with birds and bugs, and prayed and kissed the child goodnight.

I suppose if walls could really talk, we would learn alot.  If these 4 walls could tell a story, it would be a 16 year long story of joys and sorrows and secrets.  Kind of like the walls of my heart.

My child is grown and gone now, but this mama still longs for transformation.  Transformation of hearts.
This room is filled with a close sense of the presence of God.  Could it be, that one day that child's heart would be transformed like this room?  Could it be that what was once dark, would be filled with the Light of hope and the warmth of love, and filled with a close sense of the presence of God?  Like this room, that child's heart was once a place of joyful stories, prayers, and kisses....and I believe it still is.  The walls of this room haven't changed....neither has the carpet or the door or the windows.  But instead of windows used for running away, they are used to let light in and fresh spring air.  You see...our hearts are capable of many things.  It's what we fill them with that matters.  We can fill them with joyful stories, prayers, and kisses.....or we can allow the sullen confusion to drive us out the window to escape into the darkness.

My child has a sweet sweet heart.  There has never been a day that I didn't believe that.  No matter what, there is a strong and powerful love that keeps me fixed on that truth.  I'm drawn to that sweetness....and nothing will ever change that. My child will always be my sweet child.  Even in the messiness of life.  God sees me and you that way too.  I can't count the many times I have grieved Him with my words or actions. The walls of my heart have seen sullen, and dark times.  There have been times when I have "snuck out the windows" of my heart and gone out into the darkness.  But He always knows where I am.....and He ALWAYS LOVES ME.  I am His child....and because of that, no matter what happens in life, He is drawn to me by that love.....and NOTHING can ever snatch me from His embrace.

Every parent longs to see their prodigal children come home.  We wait, we watch, we pray, and we keep loving and loving and loving.  And when they come running, we meet them with open arms of forgiveness and unfathomable joy.  I am sitting in this sanctuary of a room right now, and I feel His loving arms around me as I share in intimate relationship with Abba, Son, and Spirit.  He is waiting with open arms for all of His prodigals to come home.....the door is open.

Come home sweet children.  He loves you.

Good Works

Work...I sigh heavy as I think of my weekend at work.  Am I getting too old this kind of work?  My brain sure doesn't seem to be as sharp as it needs to be, and over and over again I feel overwhelmed and defeated by the nagging doubts in my mind..."you are not good enough....you are NOT good enough...YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH".  Oh, it's not just my job as a nurse, it's everything I do...it just never seems good enough.  I always seem to fall short of the standards that I have set for myself.  I cringe as I think of the many ways that I fall short. And after I cringe so hard that my head hurts, I sigh heavy again.

Walking through life with self-made expectations works for awhile.  We can work real hard, and achieve a certain amount of success.  But is it ever really ENOUGH?  I guess the answer to that question depends on what we define "enough" to be right?  Maybe that's the problem... our understanding of what it means to be enough is entirely different than what God intends....or is it?  Here is one of the definitions of "enough" found in the dictionary:  " in a quantity or degree that answers a purpose or satisfies a need or desire; sufficiently."
I find this definition to be very intriguing because it seems to clarify, even in a godly sense, what it means to be enough.  "A quantity or degree that answers a purpose...."  So what is that purpose?

The Lord has a specific purpose for each one of us.  

But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth.

Exodus 9:16
That's it?  It seems too simple!  Are we are worst enemies when it comes to determining our purpose in life?  Maybe so.

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

Proverbs 19:20-22

We strive and strive for perfection and to be "enough", only to be disillusioned and disappointed, when all along, we were created for GOD'S purpose...and along with that comes God's enabling to fulfill that purpose.

for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.

Philippians 2:12-14

So what about all of the things in life that we feel we need to do?  What about all of my failed attempts to do things right?  What about the times that things don't turn out the way I think they should?  What about all of the people I disappoint? How do all of these things figure into that purpose?  Let's face it, life is full of that stuff!

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8:27-29

He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time,

2 Timothy 1:8-10
So....even in the struggles of life, when we feel like we are not measuring up....even in our perceived failed attempts, God's grace prevails and He uses it all for His good....IT'S ENOUGH.

But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations.
Psalm 33:10-12

Back to that definition of "enough":
" in a quantity or degree that answers a purpose or satisfies a need or desire;    SUFFICIENTLY."
When I am feeling very insufficient, I need to remember that if He enables me to fulfill His purpose, then ultimately it will satisfy His desire for my life SUFFICIENTLY because , "He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 
2 Corinthians 12:8-10

And here is my favorite part of the verse!
"Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me."

So if I understand what all of these precious words of scripture are saying, it boils down to one main idea.  Being "enough" is determined by God and His purpose for us....not by our own standards.  Being "enough" is a process that happens by God's grace through Christ Jesus.  Being "enough" is not about us...it's about glorifying God and displaying His power and love in our lives, and His power is made perfect in our weakness.  So when I feel so inadequate, perhaps that's when He does His greatest work in me!   And I can be confident of this:
" that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Phil 1:6

He will never give up on me! In His Presence, I am ENOUGH!

Sunrise/Moonset

                               SUNRISE                                       

               

MOONSET

Photo credit--Ayda Hamann

I'm in my house, and out the front window is the sunrise, and out of the back window is the moonset,

and I am all in wonder....saying to myself, "how can it be that both the sun and the moon appear at the same time?  I mean, the sun shines by day and the moon shines by night, and it's usually one or the other....right?  Usually it's day or it's night....usually it's bright or it's dark....right?  Well, lately that's how my mind has been thinking.  I see things as either black or white, good or bad, and right or wrong.  And to tell you the honest truth, I have been struggling with looking more on the dark side than the light side.

I struggle with depression.  It is especially bad in the winter months....and, I guess I should mention that

it comes also with being "a middle-aged woman" too! Anyone that has suffered depression can understand the light vs dark thing.  The light is present, yet we still feel like we are surrounded by darkness.  This blog isn't about me though...it's about the things that I am learning about God....it's about His goodness in the midst of darkness, and His "rightness" in the midst of our wrongness.  It's about His SONRISES in the morning and His MOONLIGHT in the night. His Light shines on through day and night, even when we are standing in the shadows of life.  My dear friend Kathy always says that there wouldn't be shadows if there wasn't a presence of light.  And she is right. 

 God, the Creator of the universe, created day AND night, each one working in harmony with the other. He balanced the day with the night so that each day would be recognized and counted. I believe He does that in our lives as well. He balances the joy and the sorrows in our lives, and through that, we gain a greater consciousness of Who He Is, and learn to make each day count.  Without darkness, we wouldn't understand light, and without trials, we wouldn't appreciate joy.  But He is ALWAYS PRESENT in it all. 

Seeing the moon set, the same time as the sunrise, helps me to remember that at the end of every darkness comes a new day, and at the end of every struggle comes a new joy as we acknowledge the LIGHT that was present in the midst of it all.  

God made two great lights—the                                                                 greater light to govern the day and                                             the lesser light to govern the night.
Genesis 1:16

For God who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," made His light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God's glory, displayed in the face of Christ.  2 Cor. 4:6

"Happy" New Year!

MOST PEOPLE ARE ABOUT AS HAPPY AS THEY MAKE UP THEIR MINDS TO BE. 

Abe Lincoln

But may the righteous be glad and rejoice before God; may they be happy and joyful.Psalm 68:3

Ever wonder what it is that makes children so happy all the time?  They start smiling in infancy and spend most of their childhood in that state of mind no matter what goes on around them!  They find joy in the simplest of things and their laughter comes about as freely as their breathing does!  Part of their unconditional happiness is a result of their inability to understand the difficulties of life right?  They don't get burdened by life because they live in the moment.  They dance when they feel like it, they sing when a song fills their heart, and they reach out and embrace even the most stoic of people if they feel like giving a hug!  Happiness is what most kids are all about. Their laughter is contagious!

It is a common to extend the phrase, "Happy New Year"  as we begin a new calendar year.  But I know and you know that some days are just plainly not happy.  And as a Christian, I know that God doesn't promise every day to be happy, in fact, He tells us that in this life we will have troubles (John 16:33). But in His next words, Jesus says, "take heart, for I have overcome the world!" He says, "I have told you these things so that in Me, you may have peace".  So what is happiness anyway?  Is it a feeling of bliss and a lack of sorrow, anger, or anxiety?  I don't think that the kind of happiness that God speaks of is the total absence of any other emotion.  I think He speaks of something far greater than emotion itself....something that is much deeper and complex.  The kind of happiness that God speaks of is something that surpasses and overrides any trouble that you and I may have in this world.  It is something that doesn't waver, even in the face of diversity. It is that peace that passes understanding and that joy that comes from knowing that because Jesus has overcome the world, we have too.  We are firmly rooted in Him for all eternity....and the best is yet to come!

We may not be able to shed the difficulties of life, nor should we because it is in the difficulties that we grow spiritually and gain compassion for others, but the key is to make up our minds to be happy.  To commit to look at the one thing in life that we can count as unwavering joy, Jesus...and live in His moments.  Let His songs bring singing to our lips and dancing to our feet, and let His love cause us to reach out and embrace even the most stoic of people.  Because after all, happiness can be contagious!

So, my greeting is sincere when I wish you all A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Kara